Without Adderall, nothing happens without your concentrated, controlled willpower making it so

Without Adderall, nothing happens without your concentrated, controlled willpower making it so

No more limitless energy. No more numbness to effort. You will feel the friction of every inch you travel forward. And that will make you choose your travels wisely….it will make you control them.

Then I get 7-8 hours of sleep

A lot of what I read in this article and posting is what I am going through right now. I was prescribed adderall about 11 months ago because I was overloaded at work. I was very stressed out and would very often forget tasks that were given to me and forget to call clients back all the time.

I started on 10 mg of adderall twice a day. Then bumped to 20mg twice a day. Now I am on 20 mg XR twice a day. For a long time I thought this drug was the best thing that ever happened to me. My work was going great. Not just work my golf game became better than ever and it seems there was nothing that I could not do.

I could finally concentrate and get things done

My wife moved jobs and we went without health insurance for about 3 months. I had to switch back to non XR due to the price. That is when the roller coaster ride down began. I began not being motivated at all until the adderall kicked in and then I could go. I am now back on the XR. That has changed also. Now I am having trouble going to sleep. The problem is I don’t want to go to sleep. I feel like I need to be up as long as possible. When I wake up I feel as if I have been hit by a train. My eyes are so red it is scary. I am exhausted, in a terrible mood, very grumpy, and feel very vulnerable. The scary part is it takes the adderall almost 4 hours to kick in if it does at all. If I forget to take a dose there is not anyone that would want to be around me due to my attitude. I tent to snap easily and get angry over things that are not that big of a deal. I have also noticed that my caffeine intake has gone way up.

Now the reason that I took adderall in the first place is gone (help with work). I still have a job but I am not motivated at all to work. My drive is gone. I used to be an outgoing person and I feel as if that person is hiding somewhere and is afraid to come out. My wife and I argue and I feel like it is my overall attitude that makes things blow up. While at work whenever someone comes up to me and asks me a question I just get very irritated and want them to go away. I just want to be left alone and not be bothered by anyone. I feel like answering my phone is a chore. I again I am so frustrated with the fact that I have to be talking to someone. I have decided that I no longer want to have this drug run my life anymore. I am going to the doctor tomorrow to see about getting off of adderall.

The scary part for me is I read that people are in hell while trying to quit for the first month. I have an opportunity to get a great job in the next couple of weeks. I do not want to look like crap for the interview. But I also want the real me at the interview and not the person that I have become. I know I have not been on adderall for nearly as long as some of the others on this forum but I feel like my body is just as dependent. If I forget to take my dose I will go back home to get it. If I run out before I refill the script I will go to my doctors and lie saying that I called in a refill to the office and they never got back to me so I don’t have to wait.

اترك تعليقاً

لن يتم نشر عنوان بريدك الإلكتروني.